Once bitten...

Many people might be worried that what if their first date does not work out and wonder what should they do? Well, the answer is simple, repeat the whole process again!

Do remember that this is a chance to find the partner for life, so we might have to grow many plants before we get the right harvest.

If that one person doesn't work out, do not lose heart. Only the lucky ones get the right pick at the first go itself. For the rest of us, we just have to keep trying till we succeed. It should not be that you just flipped for the first guy or girl that came your way. Take your time, give yourself some breathing space and then make the right decision.

Nobody can force you into making a commitment. It should be completely your choice. Of course, if you get the right cues and something deep down inside tells you that this is the right person for you, then what are you waiting for, go ahead and show the green signal.

But on the other hand, if someone is trying to force you into making a commitment and you feel hard pressed, gently try to break away. All you have to do is put your foot down very firmly and tell the person that you need more time.

However,it is not good to keep a person waiting indefinitely. Tell the person that you need perhaps a week's time or more than that. But don't let the person realize that you are checking out other people. Just tell them that this is probably the most important decision in your life, so you just want to be sure.

Gifts?

It is a good idea to take a gift along with you as that does create a good impression, but remember that when you are courting, the gifts should be limited to flowers or chocolates only. While you are chatting, try to find out what the other person likes in flowers and chocolates. You certainly don't want to give the person flowers that he or she is allergic to.

The object of your gift should not be to woo the person, but to create a good and lasting impression. There is no sense in splurging a lot on your first date for there is no rule that everything should work out well the first time itself. Do not overdo it and at the same time, do not appear cheap and stingy either.

However, if the other person has forgotten to bring you a gift, be quick to reassure the person that it is perfectly alright. Do not let the other person feel uneasy. In fact, that is a wonderful way to make the conversation light. You can jokingly tell the other person to get you a gift the next time.

The secret is charm

Other than creating a favorable impression during your date, there is something that is equally or even more important than that, and that is to make the other person feel comfortable. Help the other person relax.

Any way,you have been chatting for quite some time, so you do know a great deal about each other. The best thing you can do is to ease the tension and break the ice. Break it up by cracking a joke or two.

But the joke should be spotaneous and in keeping with the situation or else it will fall flat. Do not rehearse a joke because a rehearsed joke sounds.. well.. rehearsed.

The key word here is charm. Use all the charm that you can muster. Try to be as considerate and as thoughtful as possible. Do not dominate the conversation but try to get the other person talking. People generally love to talk about themselves so try to get the other person talking by asking about the person's work. Show interest in whatever the other person says.

Try to be a good conversationalist. A good conversationalist is not someone who talks well, but is one who listens well as well. So try to be a good listener. While you are listening, try not to get distracted by something else or the other person might feel that you are losing interest in what he or she is saying.

But what do you do if you find that the other person is dominating the conversation? In that case, listen patiently for a minute or two and then give a subtle sign like a raised eyebrow or a smile through the corner of your mouth. If the other person is intelligent enough, he or she will get the cue. If not, then take your chance, you might have to listen to this person for the rest of your life.

Humor rarely fails. But again, take care not to overdo it. There is only one thing worse than a total lack of humor and that is too much humor.